This week’s drama? Love or lack there of. Currently, I have friends on either end of the relationship drama scale. For some reason I’ve been giving them advice, which makes me laugh once I’m done. (I’ll be the first to admit that maybe it wasn’t asked for…) Me? The girl who stumbled her way through only one serious relationship and has since found herself one more married guy crush or fat-ass-on-eHarmony-who-closes-the-match-on-me away from hiring one of those planes with the banner ad to say “Dudes-cute, normal chick looking for love. Meet at Alterra by the lake. Free coffee for the first 10 applicants.”
My dad and I spent countless hours talking about love, what it means in real life vs. movies, and how important it is. Right after “don’t ever have a credit card balance”, I think my dad’s favorite fatherly lesson was “don’t settle.” I won’t, but I’m afraid my friends might. We don’t want to be alone. I get that. Heck, I get that more than the average bear. I seriously wonder how long I could disappear before anyone would even notice. But just someone is not better than no one. It has got to be the right someone.
I have found myself spending every First Star I See Tonight wish on “please let me meet The Guy tomorrow”, yet I see the pain and drama that comes with this whole finding a mate business. Perhaps I’ll be nit-picky and find faults that aren’t really there. Perhaps everything will start out fine, but five years down the line I’ll realize I don’t love them anymore. Or we’ve even got the basic-see a cute guy from across the crowd…he finally gets the courage to come talk to me (with 5 of his buddies) and tell me a well rehearsed story about coming down for the night from Minneapolis, only to have my friend later tell me he lives in her building. (Seriously, green shirt dude. WTF?)
There’s so much drama in the process that I hope I (and my friends) find the perfect, Hollywood, fireworks-inducing love in the end. It’s funny that I want something so bad that has potential to cause me headaches for the rest of my life. Then again, it has the potential to be the most life-fulfilling, happiness causing thing as well.
Before I continue my hunt, do you have any “be patient, young grasshopper” words of wisdom?
He'll appear when you least expect it:)
Oh Maggie, my kindred spirit, I feel your search. I too am a believer in the “One” and all I can tell you is keeping trucking, I have kissed way more than my share of frogs. So while it is wonderful and soul settling to have found one, it is pretty darn great kissing all those frogs in the mean time!! I think we have to work so hard because when it happens it IS easy, you wonder… since when is life easy? I am here to tell you eventually, when you find “him”, it will be. So I guess all the “work” is worth it, at least in my sappy, soulmate searching opinion!! In the mean time I will keep my eyes and ears open for a good one to pass your way…
I love your blogs Maggie… They are so true and from the heart… You have a right to be picky and a right to not settle… You are a awsome person… You for sure do not want to just settle for just anyone, you deserve the best:) P.S. I would love to hang out more, if you are free and want to hang out let me know.. not that i'm hitting on you now, but I do miss hanging out with you:)
"He'll appear when you least expect it." Freaking right on the money. Don't focus on it and DEFINITELIY don't worry about it. Fill your life with interesting things and by default it will be filled with interesting people. At that point just take your pick."Don't Settle" is wickedly good advice btw. Being alone is a scary thing… but from first hand experience it's worlds better than trudging through with the wrong person.
I promise to Not Settle my way into my thirties with you.
Hi Maggie, Tom and I are thinking of you and know that you are going to be OK. Your Dad gave you such great perspective and balance. It will carry you through all of the tough times. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. The Hounsell's